‘Bāhar Bhitar’, 2009
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Yesterday evening, Dr. Yashwant Goswami and Dr. Manhar Goswami with a friend came to meet me. These are from Rajkot and have come Delhi to participate in a seminar organized by Hansraj College. Both, Dr. Yashwant and Dr. Manhar are very intimate with me. Both have accomplished their research work on my novels. During their research work, they came closer to me; rather it’s their nature to become intimate with everyone. Phone calls from these two brothers continually ring for me. They not only keep enquiring about my well being, but also express their unfathomed love and respect for me. They frequently ask me to visit Rajkot and stay with them for some days. I too wish the same, but the adverse health conditions don’t allow me, though the pleasant experience of the Rajkot journey undertaken once keeps humming in me.
Yes, when I had visited Ahmedabad on the occasion of the sixtieth birthday of my true sincere Dr. Raghuveer Chaudhary, Yashwant Goswami took me to Rajkot. Excuse was a seminar. I had to deliver speech in the seminar being conducted in the Hindi department of Sourashtra University. The speech I delivered was another thing, but the love and respect I received there from the people was unique. Variety of poetic essence showered in the symposium organized by the department. A gentleman recited a poem on dog in the style of dog.
Brother Yashwant insisted to take me to his college for a short while and address the students of Hindi. I was not willing to. I could not decide what to speak before undergraduate students. But it was love seasoned insistence of Goswamiji that pulled me there. The respect among students I saw for myself was astonishing. The hall echoed with huge clapping and number of girl students approached me with flowers. They listened to my speech and poems with full concentration. I felt that visiting the place had turned a pleasant event of my life. I experienced much lovelier contexts in Rajkot. Dave was writing a dissertation for M. Phil on my fiction. On the insistence of her father, we went to a village hotel situated at a short distance from the city. The hotel constructed in rural atmosphere had a different look. It felt very nice. All India Radio staff too took me for some time. It means, the two- three days’ journey to Rajkot became a life time memory for me. Yashwant Bhai’s urge repeatedly kept striking me to visit Rajkot again and I wished too but couldn’ do.
Yashwant Bhai keeps enquiring my well being through telephonic calls. He not only himself enjoys my literature but also motivates others too to enjoy. He has translated my three-four novels in Gujrati language. So I felt very sweet when he visited my house yesterday with Manhar and a friend. Though we couldn’t talk so much, whatever we did was not less to fill our hearts. In fact, he called me around six in the evening from Malkaganj and told that he wished to see me immediately. I consented but was in doubt that he is a stranger for Delhi. It’s getting dark. When will he reach? And the fear came true. The 816 number bus dropped him in two hours and he could reach my home a quarter to nine. Though we kept on talking, yet suspected that they might get delayed and when the clock rang ten, we felt that they must leave now. Had they stayed the night with us I would have been happy!
All this was fine, but they had come with a pain too. That very pain lingered for a long duration. They were saying that Hindi is being expelled from Gujrat. In the new syllabus being formulated for graduation, English is compulsory while Hindi is an option against Sanskrit. Obviously, Sanskrit has higher scoring merit, so students are opting for Sanskrit. Now the situation is that there are only 10 students in undergraduate courses of their college against 250 of the past. Now the doors for Hindi professors are being shut and in addition, the working ones are in danger. We are stunned how the BJP government claiming to be supporter of Indian languages and culture is becoming infatuated with English? So much infatuated that Hindi seems her to a black spot- that very Hindi which was wished by her top leader Atal Bihari Bajpayi to be the language of the United Nations and in one of the sessions he had spoken in Hindi. Narendra Modi himself speaks Hindi very well and proclaims himself to be in its favor. Then why all this?
I kept listening to them and lost in my past. They reminded me of my past. I too have been a victim of the biased policy against Hindi. It had been a compulsory language up to intermediate in Gujrat. When three-year syllabus was being formulated, the big writers and educationists of Gujrat kept Hindi as an optional subject in pre-university course. For rest of intermediate and B. A., it was expelled. Yes, in honors course one could opt if wished to. Following the current, the first pious work that our Saint Xavier’s college did was to discontinue post graduate center (whereof I was in-charge). The second task was that they discontinued B.A. Honors course. Hindi just survived in pre-university course. In this way, the college prepared a solid ground to expel me. I can remember those days when I roamed here and there in search of a job and returned empty handed even from very cheap places. This senior Hindi lecturer was just a poor fellow for the people. Their neutralism used to sting him. Anyhow, he felt relief when he could establish himself in Delhi. He along with many others felt that the leaf being flown by the storm was dropped at the right place. So wish that this anti-Hindi storm of Narendra Modi would not throw out any one in adverse. I had got my Delhi, but can’t say others will get their Delhi or not.
Goshwami brothers told me that Hindi lecturers and servants are collectively opposing this anti-Hi.ndi policy. They want me write a letter to Narendra Modi and convince him to think in favor of Hindi. They would get my letter published there in the local news papers. I said that I would look into the matter. But I kept thinking by myself why Modi ji would accept my views. He might have not heard about me. And even if he knows me, who among the politicians of today’s world cares for litterateur? Politicians of the past had been companions of the writers. They themselves illuminated with the literary images, so they listened to the literature, but what now?
I don’t think I deserve to write a letter requesting him to do something in favor of Hindi. Why would Modi ji get worried about my letters? Does a leader’s political ego allow him to have a glance over the sensitivity of a litterateur? I remember that the ex Chief Minister of Gujrat, late Chimmanbhai Patel was my colleague in Saint Xavier college. Then he had a Lambretta. I had a good chance to be a pillion, but when he grew as a big leader, he didn’t remain the same Chimmanbhai, rather considered himself as our master.
Wife says, “Why do you get upset? People from remote areas have misconception about you, let them keep it and enjoy.” Of course, so many people have conceived pleasant misconception about me. The misconception is that I am in Delhi and a renowned litterateur, so I must have deep influence in the world of political power. Once a kin of mine came to me. He wanted to contest election on the ticket of Congress party. He said to me, “Jija ji (brother in law), if you ask Sanjay Gandhi, I may get ticket.” I got astonished. I said, “Brother, how could Sanjay Gandhi know me? I don’t have any relation with him.” He replied, “O Jija ji, who doesn’t know you in the nation? Sanjay Gandhi must be familiar with you.” I laughed and uttered, “Who won’t die on this illusion, O God!” Another instance is from Varanasi. A young man used to visit me. Once he had interviewed me. While strolling together in Varanasi, he happened to say, “Doctor Sahib, I want to contest election on the ticket of BJP.” “Why not, it’s good!” “But how to contest? If I could get the ticket, only then. If you please request Atal Bihari Bajpai, I must get the ticket.” Oh! The same illusion here too. I tried my best to convince him that I didn’t have any relation with Atal ji, but he insisted that Atal ji himself is a poet, so he must be knowing me. “Of course, I know that he knows me a little, but just knowing a little is not sufficient for such a big task. There must be intimacy, political equations. Brother, don’t hatch any illusion for me.”
How strange I am too! Wherever I have been, I couldn’t establish any equation with the power. Keep the political world aside, I couldn’t meet the top authorities of even the educational institutions where I worked. I have been in Delhi since last 45 years but couldn’t establish intimacy with any of the political leaders, even some of them might be an ex-classmate. But people in remote areas have illusion that I am in Delhi and a renowned litterateur, so I can get anything done that I wish to while I am there even not able to tell my helplessness. Let it be so, I am living a free life though ineffective. Helplessness, insecurity and pains of authority ridden people are no less. How can they freely dialogue with the sun and wind and move around with liberty?
Now, I am thinking over whether I should write the letter to Modi ji or not?